Friday, January 04, 2008

New Year's resolutions...for all those others.

Face it, shall we? New Year's resolutions for ourselves tend to last about as long as the flavor of chewing gum does...if that long.

But hey, that doesn't mean we can't create resolutions for All Those Other People Whose Lives Need Improving!

So let it rip. Here are some of, for others:

  • I will strive to forgo umbrellas in busy city areas. Repeat to self: Umbrellas Are Evil. They have the potential of knocking out the eyeballs of people.
  • I will not ever again open my driver's side door while parked on a busy street, because this is a royal pain to oncoming traffic.
  • If I must talk to someone on a cell phone on a crowded bus, I will keep the discussion brief and incidentally won't regale the whole crowd with intimate details of last night's date.
  • As a driver, I will stop at all crosswalks.
  • As a pedestrian, I will not leap out at a crosswalk, assuming it's my God-given right to cause a coronary to unsuspecting drivers.
There's a few...have fun with your own. And're doing others a favor! :-)