So, anyway, as I was walking home tonight, I distinctly sensed there was rain in the air. As is my habit, I muttered to Jesus: "I'm going to grab a bus. And I'll pray Evening Prayer on it."
As is NOT my habit, I also distinctly heard an answer: "Oh, you'll pray all right!"
Hmmm...
I climbed on the bus and was greeted by the cutest little girl and her beautiful Mom. "Hey! I remember you!" the kid cried out. I didn't recognize her, but gave her my most (or so I thought) dazzling smile. And opened my breviary (on my phone) to Vespers. This wasn't going to happen.
Little Girl (hereafter known as "
Kid," turning and smiling at me...she couldn't have been more than five): "Hey! It's ME!"
Me: (recapturing so called dazzling smile) "Oh yes! How
are you"! [leave me alone kid]
Kid: "You remember me, right?"
Me: "Oh, of course!" (?)
Kid: "Well, I have a question!"
Me: [As. Kindly. As. I. Could. Get.] "Oh! Sure, what is it?"
Kid: "Well...my Mom here has a beautiful smile. Daddy always says so. Why are your teeth so crooked?"
[Picture, if you will, said Beautiful Mom, wanting to drop into a hole somewhere.]
Me: "Uh...well..(thinking frantically for an answer...yep, got it!)...well, when I was a little girl, a bit older than you? I disobeyed my Mom and Dad and didn't wear my braces!"
[Which was, o' course, a damn lie..my parents couldn't afford braces.]
Kid: "Oh. But why do you have that brown thing on your tooth?"
[Damn tea, black coffee, and that Saturday Night Cigar, anyway!!!]
Me: "Oh! Well! It's from -- hey, what's your favorite soda?"
Kid: "Oh, I love Coke!"'
Me: [after a brief prayer of gratitude] "Me too! But...you'd better watch out. Too much sugar, Cokes, candy, and all that other stuff? It'll make a stain on your tooth!"
Kid: "But that's what my MOM said!"
[insert beautiful Mom offering me a glance of supreme gratitude]
Kid: "But why are you so
skinny? My Dad thinks my Mom is
beautiful!"
Me: [kinda warming to this] "Because I Didn't. Eat. My Fruit. And Vegetables!!!"
[Another lie, but what the bleep...blame it on Jesus! :-) Also I got another grateful glance from the Very Well Built Mom, so hey...what harm?]
Kid: "Oh. But I don't
like vegetables. I like fruit though."
Me: [warming more to my nonexistent subject] "You only
think you don't like vegetables. Actually? They make you
beautiful!"
Kid: [evidently bored with the dietary conversation]: "Is that JESUS on you???"
Me: [stupidly looking down on my sweater] "Why...yes, this is a `crucifix.'" [I'll show her!] "Do you know what a `crucifix' is?"
Kid: "Yes, yes, yes! I have one of my own, right Mommy?"
Mommy: "Yes, baby."
Kid: "I'm NOT a baby."
Mommy: "Show the lady your Crucifix."
And she did! With a dazzling smile!
Me: [suddenly welling up with tears]: "It's beautiful. Thank you for showing me."
Kid: "Oh, that's okay. I love you. Do you love me?"
Me: [about ready to lose it]: "Yes, very much. I...oh, gee, I've got to get off at the next stop."
Kid: [tears also welling up] "NO! I'm having FUN! You CAN'T get off now!"
Mommy: "Let the lady go, sweetie."
Kid: "Okay, but can't we go home with her?"
Mommy: [looking apologetically at me] "Not tonight, hon...maybe some other time."
Me: [thinking what the bleep? I WANT to take them home....then I came to my senses] "Okay, guys, time for me to get off."
Kid: "Bye! Thanks for talking to us!"
Me: "Bye! Don't forget to say your prayers!"
Kid: [rather scornfully, I thought, but maybe not]: "Don't YOU forget!"
~ ~ ~
The bus driver let me kiss them both good-bye before I got off. And I think I heard Jesus say, very quietly..."nice prayer!" :-)