Sunday, June 03, 2007

Kelly to host His Holiness in 2008?

Cardinal Sean P. O'Malley has invited Pope Benedict XVI to come to Boston next year...O'Malley said he is hopeful that the pope will accept the invitation because 2008 is both the bicentennial of the Archdiocese of Boston and because Benedict is already expected to come to the country to visit the United Nations.

I have just the room for the Holy Father!

It's upstairs, next to an actual prayer room (complete with a Wayside Crucifix, prie-dieu, and holy water font). Get this: the windows are cathedral windows! And if that's not enough, there's a small but eminently efficient kitchen that would be reserved strictly for the Pontiff! I'll even stock it with food.

(Most would, of course, be of the nuke sort since the kitchen sports a cook-top, refrigerator/freezer, and a microwave...but no oven. On the other hand, squeezed into it is a washer/dryer combo. And I'd even volunteer to iron the vestments!)


Additional qualifications...

My parish is the Cathedral of the Holy Cross...the Mother Church of the Archdiocese! So, you know, I can show him around, you know. Where to vest, that sorta stuff. Plus I give a great tour of the place. We've got a crypt, you know, so he can see where the bodies are buried...so to speak.

Bonus! I happen to know where the side entrance to the rectory is—where Cardinal O'Malley lives—and can probably manage to get the Holy Father his own key!

Privacy? No problemo! I can get the Pope to anywhere he wants to go blindfolded...I mean, I know the city. No need for the Pope-Mobile once he's in my hands.

I think it's pretty much a done deal...but I only have one diplomatic question:

Certainly by the time the Holy Father gets here, Jesus of Nazareth will be out in paperback. Would it be tacky of me to ask the Pope to sign a paperback version or should I spring for the hardcover?